This too shall pass. Five Parenting Phases that you WILL get through. Promise.

Tonight at dinner, my five year old daughter said to me, “Thanks for the green beans, mom!” After wiping the smug I’m-such-a-great-mother smirk off my face, I remembered how offering healthy foodstuffs wasn’t so easy. I used to stay up nights thinking my child’s growth would be stunted; her teeth, hair and other body parts may disintegrate due to lack of sustenance aside from eating copious amounts of Pirate Booty. How would we ever get through this??

When I had my second child, I took comfort in the been-there-done-that and knew that every annoying, frustrating and seemingly unending bad habit was only a phase. Here are the myths my child and I overcame together. It eventually happens, I promise you that.

Myth #1: My child will ONLY nap in his own bed.

My kids needed a daily nap almost as equally as they required oxygen. So when I used to put them down for a nap at the homes of friends or family, it definitely didn’t work right away. Keep at it! The more they are comfortable with different environments, the more freedom you will have as a family. Eventually, they will nap. Maybe not as long as they would in their own beds, but they will sleep (and you won’t be a prisoner in your own home anymore).

Myth #2: My child will ONLY sleep over night in his/her own bed at home.

See Myth #1.

Myth #3: My child will be using a pacifier until he/she is 35.

Rip it off like a bandaid. Stop offering them and don’t look back. It’ll be one week of pure h*ll, and then it will be over. This allegedly also works for bottles, diapers and cribs.

Myth #4: You need to present a child with a new food at least 10 times before they will try it.

It’s more like two years or 1,532 times, whichever comes first.

Myth #5: My child will cry every day, all day long when I drop him/her off at school.

Oooh, this one realllllly tugs at the heartstrings. Know this: It’s much harder for you than it is for them. They’re usually fine five minutes after you leave, and although it might take a few weeks, or even a few months, the seemingly endless river of tears does eventually dry up.

In the whole scheme of things, my children are still young and I have many, many, many more phases to stomach. What I do know is that nothing lasts forever. What I don’t know is…eeeks, what’s around the next corner. But, we’ll get through it (I hope).

What phases have you outlived? How’d you do it? Share your thoughts and help other parents who feel up a stream without a paddle.

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